On marriage.

What we call 'being in love' is a glorious state, and, in several ways, good for us. It helps to make us generous and courageous, it opens our eyes not only to the beauty of the beloved but to all beauty, and it subordinates (especially at first) our merely animal sexuality; in that sense, love is the great conqueror of lust. No one in his senses would deny that being in love is far better than either common sensuality or cold self-centredness. But, as I said before, 'the most dangerous thing you can do is to take any one impulse of our own nature and set it up as the thing you ought to follow at all costs'. Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last; but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called 'being in love' usually does not last. If the old fairy-tale ending 'They lived happily ever after' is taken to mean 'They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married', then it says what probably never was nor ever would be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be 'in love' need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense - love as distinct from 'being in love' - is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be 'in love' with someone else. 'Being in love' first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.

-from Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis

Phil and Alisha, I hope that you guys have the greatest of marriages, and may you always love each other through thick and thin. In all the years that I've known you, you two have amazed me in everything that you have been through as a couple. I sincerely hope that my relationship with my girlfriend (God willing) will be at least a hint of what your relationship has been. God bless you both! Though C.S. Lewis may not have been married at the time he wrote that bit, I think he has a good view of what marriage should be like.

I love you guys with all my heart.

I'm a material boy in this material world.

Actually, not really...though I do enjoy getting free stuff. Christmas was terrific! I got a few nice and good gifts (including the Goo Goo Dolls new live cd), but the greatest coolio thing I got was a guitar for my very own. After years of borrowing and holding other people's guitars, I can say that this Fender acoustic guitar is mine. MINE! The guitar was from all those who contributed to the present, as I'm told. So thank you, family and friends, for the thing! It will be used often.




Okay, everything else about yesterday was good too. Great Filipino food, a nice little service in the household, and great fellowship with all the loved ones. No karaoke, though. That was a bit of a letdown.

Happy Boxing Day!

90 minutes left!

Christmas is just around the corner! I'm so excited I could chew my own tongue into vapor! Amazing!

My family minus Tim, Chesney, and Caleb went to a church for the Christmas Eve evening service. Nothing against the church, but it was the worst Christmas service I've ever attended. We sang Dreaming of a White Christmas instead of Angels We Have Heard on High and Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer instead of The First Noel...while we had thick hymnal books right in front of us. Snowy evergreen trees were displayed on stage and the quartet wore Santa hats and reindeer antlers while the cross was hidden behind the giant white sheet to show the lyrics to the songs.

Joseph apparently took Mary for his wife because he was a loving, forgiving, and merciful man instead of the fact that he was told by an angel that Mary is carrying the Son of God. Jesus' reason to come to earth as a baby was so people wouldn't be afraid of him. After all this time, I thought it was to show that He is a humble God...not to mention all the prophecies. Silly me!

Anyhow, we went to a family friend's place for dinner, which was fun, and we opened a present each tonight. Rachel was excited to get her Oregon Trail. The Christmas season is still all around. Despite all the pagan traditions we have come to love, I'm glad that people around the nation still haven't forgotten we still need to remember Jesus' birth...even if the sermon sucks. Still bitter about the music, though. Rudolph...bah!

On another note: Luke Shackelford has a blog! Hurrah!

Merry Christmas everyone!

Preparation.

I find that Christmas shopping is one difficult thing. But maybe that's because I haven't done much shopping and just thinking about what would be a good gift. I should just go out and buy stuff and figure out who to give it to later.

I have done some shopping, so I'm good. Mostly for my immediate family, which is what really matters. Everything else is just fun gifts. It's nice not having a girlfriend because at these times, it's just extra money I get to keep. Maybe I can get one of those anti-consumer ladies who thinks that materal possessions are terrible.

Oh wait, there's no such thing.

It's fun to get gifts, though, because it's fun to give! Yeah!

"It starts with..."

Alright, the majority of the weekend was spent driving. It felt that way, at least. Tim Machlan, Oli, and I drove up to the Bay Area (mostly Tim driving...heh, thanks Tim!) around 2 am Friday morning, and then back down around 3:30 pm on Sunday afternoon.

The reason was for the long awaited hockey tournament that our cousins and I joined. The result: We got freakin' rocked! And by "rocked," I mean rocked like a virgin with a prostitute for the first time. That's alright, though, because we had fun. We all knew we wouldn't do well, but we wanted to know where we stood.

Actually, to defend ourselves a little, I found out the day of the tourney that out of all the three or four leagues within the tournament, only four teams joined. So it didn't matter that we joined the second to worst league because they just had all of us play 'round robin. So, really, we were playing guys way more advanced than we planned.

But that's alright, none of us complained really. We all knew we sucked, and the other teams knew we sucked, and the refs knew we sucked, and everyone who was watching us knew we sucked. We took it so well that we became the well-loved underdogs that everyone cheered for. Danny was able to score in our last game, becoming the only player to get our only goal! We went so crazy, Caleb started to grow hair! All in all, we freakin' got schooled, but we enjoyed playing other people and we learned a ton. I know I did. Amazing how much you learn about a sport by just playing four games.

Good, bad, and funny things that happened this weekend:

-My front bumper practically fell off on our trip up to the Bay Area. It's okay now, we nailed it back onto the car.

-We watched half of 24: Season Tree. Awesome.

-Phil: "It starts with 'porn.'"

-Punching, slapping, and backhanding Tim in the face whenever we wanted.

-Phil: "And ends with 'ography.'"

-Nathan insulting random people on Star Wars Galaxies.

-Lisa: "I'm so glad you guys aren't planning my wedding...I mean [turning to Daniel], our wedding. Sorry."

Mac: [to Lisa] "No, it's your wedding...'cuz Guys just don't care."

[very brief silence]

Nathan: "He just wants to tap that."

[looks over at Chuck]

"Chuck knows what I'm talking about."

Chuck: "Always."

Oliver then grins happily.

David: "Yeah, that's why guys get married."

Lem: "Man, you don't need to get married for that."

"Heeeere's Johnny!"

I decided to give one of the classics a chance and visited a horror classic The Shining. Now I know where all the great quotes come from ("Red rum!"). The movie is great; I can see why it's a classic. It gets unexplainably weird at the end, and that's my only complaint. But then again, I never read the book, so maybe some of the things that happened in the movie have to do with the contents only presented in the book.

Also, orange juice and vodka is really good.

Really, it only looks like I'm a chain smoker.

I look so sexy in this picture. 


This cigar actually didn't taste that good. That's okay, it was only three dollars. 


I didn't actually smoke that cigarette (minus a puff for the picture). Why? Because cigars are better. 

Robert Zimmerman.

Yesterday I watched the interview with Bob Dylan on 60 Minutes. It was interesting watching and listening to Dylan's view on his life back then and today. I'm not an avid fan of his, though I do like his music when I hear it here and there. He spoke of how it was his "destiny" to become a musician.

He isn't particularly thrilled about performing and song writing today, though he still believes that it's his destiny to keep on doing the music thing. He's just pulling his end of the deal. What was his answer when he was asked who he made the deal with? I recall him saying something along the lines of the "Chief Commander" of this world and beyond. Very cool, Dylan.

And you're right, "Bob Dylan" is a better name than "Robert Zimmerman." Good call.


Bob Dylan's The Freewheelin' Bob Dylan 

Blowin' in the Wind

How many years can a mountain exist
Before it's washed to the sea?
Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
Before they're allowed to be free?
Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head
Pretending he just doesn't see?
The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
The answer is blowin' in the wind.

On another note: Our hockey team will be playing in a San Jose tourney this Friday. Here's our official website. Wish us luck!

The ideal.

I finally finished 24: Season Two. I must say, it took me long enough! Great ending, though the cliffhanger was kind of weird seeing that the end of each season for this series doesn't really connect to the start of the next. Ah, well.

I can't help but think that President Palmer is the writers' way of telling President Bush how he should have handled going to war with Iraq. Sort of a slap in the face for the real president. But then again, this season came out before we went to war with Iraq. At least, I believe it came out before then.

Onto The Shield: Season Two!

Christmas mindsets.

The best way I get into the Christmas spirit is receiving all the wonderful gifts from family, friends, and family friends. You could help me get into the Christmas spirit. Simply check out my wish list on Amazon.com and buy something from it for me. With Christmas just around the corner, and Kuya giving the good idea of making wish lists, I was inspired to list all the current materialistic items I would like to have to help develop my love for earthly things. Thanks, world!

I went to the Philips' Christmas party last night. That was fun. Friends young and old, from church and school, and quiet and loud joined together under one roof to create one diversified group. We had a lot of fun. I ate lots of snacks because I was hoping they'd serve some kind of light dinner, but it ended up being home-baked sweets with apple juice. My body ran purely on sugar that night, and my restlessness proved it.

The best part was when the party was in its last hours and all of us young, hip lads busted out the bongo and acoustic, electric, and bass guitars to jam out. It mostly consisted of worship songs, and it was kind of silly having three guitarists strumming the exact same thing, but it was still fun. Todd, Tim, Josh, and I recorded a song we made up earlier in the night about Taylor, which was fun. It's repetitive, not to well recorded, not greatly sung, and long, but at 1 am after a big get together, it sounded cool.

We also made a quick video for it, which is even more trippy. No, there was no drug use involved before the making of the video. We're just naturally weird and foolish.

The other day, I watched the classic Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer on tv. I loved it. I remember watching that when I was a little child. I loved it just as much then too. "Why am I such a misfit!?"

More Christmas things to come in later posts, I'm sure. For now, I'm done.

Awake, my dreamy state!

What do I want to dream about tonight?
I desire to soar through silver clouds;
Watch as majestic eagles take flight,
In the sun where there's no darkened shroud.

I'd like to see me in a different world
Where creatures only exist in folklore tales,
And I am mighty with my courage unfurled;
And I'd battle great evil yet prevail.

Perhaps I could find a true love there
On a beach of golden sand.
With sapphire eyes and silken hair,
She and I together on a distant land.

Alright, that's enough of that. It is clear that my poetry gets pretty trippy at 2:30 in the morning. I was much better off watching the last episodes of 24: Season Two. I debated whether to finish off the last couple episodes, but I decided to blog instead. What do I end up doing? I end up writing a poem...a poem!

Ah, well. Chrissy gave me the idea to write about what I would like to dream about tonight, so it's partly her fault. I won't give her the glory of thinking of writing a poem, though. No way, Jose! That was all me!

Anyhow, this is what I really want to dream about tonight: I want to dream about being some kind of cool special agent. One who isn't recognized by any government; one who technically doesn't exist. I'd do freelance special missions for the U.S. that would better the common good of its citizens. And I'd kill lots of people (bad people, of course) in really cool, stylish ways like Jason Bourne or James Bond would. But most of importantly, I would like to remember my dreams, for goodness' sake!

Yeah, that'd be a rockin' dream. Happy sleeping everyone! Oh, wait...the majority of everyone is already doing that. I'll take that as a hint. Goodbye, goodnight.

ADDED AT 3:09 AM

Speaking of poems, I went through my back up files and found a poem that I'm actually quite proud of. And given the U.S.'s state with Iraq, I thought this may be fitting.

I Know Why the Soldier Weeps (3/19/02)

I know why the soldier weeps
When he returns from a hard-fought battle
And finds a life-long friend is now asleep
When on the boat before they leap
See the others slaughtered like cattle
When he prays the Lord his soul to keep
I know why the soldier weeps

I know why the soldier fears
Witnessing the destruction of war
When screams of pain is all he hears
And feels abandoned by the great Overseer
When he sees missiles and bombs soar
And the toughest of men shed a tear
I know why the soldier fears

But I know why the soldier shoots the gun
When kills enemies with all his might
And when surrounded he mustn’t run
To pave a future for his loving son
For his country he protects and fights
So death in his land will not become
I know why the soldier shoots the gun